Sunday, August 24, 2008

Gunpowder Empire

This book is the first of the "Cross-time Traffic" series by Harry Turtledove, who is famous for writing "alternate history" stories. This book reveals the flaws with alternate history stories; the author has to predict what would have happened, but base it on what DID happen. Thus, he'll sometimes (or, in this book, frequently) make predictions that strike the reader as laughably wrong-headed. For example, the protagonist, Jeremy Solter and his sister Amanda, live in the late 21st century, where scientists have discovered a way to travel to all the alternate versions of our world. There are some where the Nazis won WWII, where the South won the Civil War, where the Roman Empire never fell, etc. Because humans have ruined this planet with global warming, (cough, cough), they have to put people on these alternate histories, undercover, to trade for grain, food, oil, etc.

Jeremy and his family travels to a world where Rome never fell, and has not advanced technologically beyond clumsy flintlocks. Then, his parents travel home for his mom to have an appendectomy, and the portals stop working. So, he and his sister are on their own in a Roman town.

The problem with this book is that the attitudes that Jeremy and Amanda have are so incredibly politically correct as to be ridiculous, even if you buy the premise that humanity has made great technological strides in the late 21st century. For example, at one point Jeremy recieves the gift of a nice marten fur coat. But he is so disgusted by it, because, in his world, "only perverts still wear fur", that he actually throws up. Later, the author has Jeremy wonder why, since he still eats meat, he should be so offended by fur, but he has no good answer. That's likely because it's a ridiculous position to take, or to predict that humanity will have moved so far that he would think it perverted to wear fur. And the constant, CONSTANT repetition of how their tender feelings are abused by slavery, well, in the words of another reviewer, "their precious and unwavering moral rectitude almost had me reaching for the airsickness bag myself at times".

Other examples include Amanda refusing to let Jeremy take the lead in negotiations and such, because it's sexist, despite the fact that everyone else in that whole world has that sexist attitude and will therefore disregard her, Jeremy feeling guilt while it's happening for stabbing an enemy soldier who has broken into their house, and Amanda marvelling that she has become such a barbarian as to hope that the soldiers defending their town actually win the battle, instead of the other guys.

It's psychotic. These people purposely go undercover in these other societies and try to blend in, but they trade things like Swiss army knives, and other odd things, and they eschew the use of modern weapons for protection (so they can blend in), but they don't bother to train in the use of that societies' weapons. Jeremy has no clue how to use a sword or bow. I'm sorry, people who are actually trying to survive are not so hoity-toity or self-righteous about doing what's necessary, including killing if they have to. You're not in Kansas anymore, you nancy-boy.

So, for them to prevail, despite their best efforts, through dumb luck, well, that was very unsatisfying to me. People that dumb, who refuse to recognize reality, don't last long. I won't be reading any more of Mr. Turtledove's works.

4 yards.

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